Wednesday 16 November 2011

"The Notebook" Muses


So I recently watched "The Notebook", and yes, it is almost 2012.
Here are some things I found interesting.

- true love always begins with parental disapproval
- doing something silly, like staring at traffic lights, will lead to love
- the staff in modern old people's homes are still entirely African-American
- if you annoy, aggravate, and frighten a girl enough, she will eventually go out with you
- all intimidating fathers have mustaches
- attempting to reverse your lovers dementia by reading her a book will lead to sudden death
- all real love involves writing letters
- long shots of birds flying in the distance is a reliable default ending
- a sudden rain storm is a definite per-cursor to sex (see poster)

Please leave a comment and feel free to enlighten the world with your own personal muses!

Tuesday 28 June 2011

SNEAK PEEK: Radiohead (live From The Basement)



Here's a special sneak peek preview of the highly anticipated "live from the Basement" special which will be broadcast by BBC beginning July 1. It will be a 55-minute long recording of their album "The King of Limbs," which will also include songs not on the LP, such as "Staircase" that's shown in the video.

Other songs rumored to be performed are "Supercollider" and "The Butcher" which were both released as singles as part of Record Store Day 2011.

I'm really, really looking forward to "live from the Basement," especially following the success of their previous program with "In Rainbows" using the same format. It's a truly special performance because of its' intimacy; no host or audience members - just the band doing what they do best. Let's hope Thom brings his dance moves!

Tuesday 21 June 2011

Ryan Dunn - First "Jackass" Fatality



Here is a video of the late "Jackass" star, Ryan Dunn, chugging a bottle of tequila in front of a live audience. Dunn died this morning in a terrible car accident where he lost control driving his Porsche, hit a couple of trees, where his car consequently lit up in flames. The other passenger also died. Just a few hours before the accident, he had posted a picture of him and his buddies having drinks at a bar. It's not too difficult to connect the dots here.

Dunn was one of the stars of "Jackass", an MTV show that centered around a couple of guys doing extremely stupid and outrageous stunts. He was best known for shoving a "toy car up his rectum", as quoted in an obituary found online.

Celebrities have not kept quiet about this. Most of them are sympathetic, and are sending prayers. But some, like film critic Roger Ebert, are using this incident to bring light to a broader issue; drunk driving. Ebert wrote on his Twitter account, "Friends don't let jackasses drink and drive."

Others think its too soon for those kind of comments, primarily celeb blogger Perez Hilton. He dedicated a post to Ebert's Tweet, "We think there's no reason that anyone should be pointing fingers or poking fun at a truly tragic situation. Everyone makes mistakes, and this is somebody's son. Too soon, Roger."

Perez's fans don't think so. One responded with, "Totally true statement, I don't see anything wrong with it." Another writes, "It wasn't just Ryan who died, the dude actually killed someone, so stupid!"

There is actually a rumor going around cyberspace saying that his death is a prank for an upcoming movie. If it's true, that would be a sick and disgusting antic, but would anyone be surprised coming from the Jackass star? People have been saying on Twitter, "RIP, you were my hero!".......really? A guy who consciously hurts himself and others has become a model for living? Again, the standards of this society should be questioned.

So what it boils down to is an issue of respect. This guy was someone's friend, son, brother, cousin, and he died in a violent accident at the age of 34. But he also drank an entire bottle of Tequila for entertainment, rolled down rooftops, and jumped in front of cars.

Did he have it coming?
What do you think?

Friday 17 June 2011

America Loves Weiner





Here's the video of Congressman Weiner resigning today. It gets pretty funny in the middle when a heckler yells out, "Was it 7 inches?"

For the past few weeks, Congressman Weiner's weiner has been in the spotlight in America. He sent pictures of his privates to a girl on Twitter, proceeded to say that his account had been hacked, and ultimately confessed that it was him. This was followed by the release of other photos of Weiner that he had sent to additional women. The photos were of Weiner's body taken in a Congressional gym (I wonder how many dirty things happen in there).

From the get-go, Weiner said he is not going to resign. Obama initially didn't condone it either, but the story got so popular and mainstream, that he later deemed it as a major "distraction" and called for his resignation. He resigned today.

But here's the thing....America NEEDS distractions. We strive off of them. So many politicians have been in the center of sex scandals that have constantly made headlines. Doesn't our government have the power to prohibit the public release of these stories? Can't they only exist among the few people involved, including a secret resignation? You can say that these stories are just examples of transparency that the government tries to practice, but why is sex scandal transparency given priority over war, oil prices, or things that should actually matter?

We live in a country where people can name all eight members of the Kardashian Family, but not the name of our Vice President. So Congressman Weiner, thanks for contributing an adult "sexting" story that we can all be distracted by, your country thanks you.

Saturday 11 June 2011

Tracy Morgan; Moral Compass or Comic?

"What did one tomato say to the other as they were rolling down the hill? Go ahead, I'll ketchup!"
"Why did the football coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback."

Now let me ask you, would you ever pay $20 to see a comedian at the Improv say these jokes? No, because they are not racist, sexist, or homophobic (and that's the truth).

Tracy Morgan recently said that if his son were gay, he'd stab him with a knife, and that women should be in the kitchen cooking rather than becoming CEOs. Michael Richards told his security to get rid of the "niggers" in the audience during his well-documented rant. Although these statements took place in the context of a comic routine, these specific instances have been repeatedly highlighted within mainstream media, carrying the heavy power to completely destroy the comedians reputation while consequently ending their careers.

Yeah, they might have been on the extreme side, but that's what comedians do. Their content revolves around making fun of the world we live in, which includes different races, genders, and sexualities. After a long day at work, people want to kick back and see some guy talk about something NOT politically correct, something that might be on their own mind but obviously not expressed for societal reasons.

In the wake of Morgan's recent scandal, does he deserve to be treated by the media with statements like "anti-Gay tirade," "homophobic rant," or "violent and disturbing"? If we're following these standards and protocols, shouldn't every comedian be put under the spotlight after every act?

Here are similar jokes by comics that probably didn't make it to the 5-o'clock news.
Carlos Mencia: "It's never a good idea to sit next to KHHKH on an airplane. Those fuckers hate us, and if you see a KHHKH flying the plane, don't be surprised if he comes on the intercom and says the planes going to fly into a building...it's what they do!"
Dane Cook: "I was swerving in my lane and as I was stopped at the red light, the guy tells me 'can you please not swerve anymore?', but if he was black he'd say, 'stop that motherfucker!"
Sarah Silverman: "I was raped by a doctor, which is so bittersweet for a Jewish girl."

Ultimately, you can't punish Richards if you're not gonna punish douchebag Dane for his (unfunny) jokes against black people. And if you're looking at a comedian to act as your moral compass, do our society a favor and move to Canada.

Tuesday 24 May 2011

Starbucks, Stop the Abuse.


John Proctor from The Crucible once said, "How may I live without my name? I have given you my soul; leave me my name!"

He was actually yelling at a Starbucks barista.

You can say that a name isn't that important. It it just a label placed on someone upon birth to merely differentiate from the other kids in the playground. But the majority of people would disagree; a name has a much more meaningful purpose, to define the roots, history, and disposition of the said individual. And if this name were to be tampered with any way, the identity would ultimately be tampered as well.

Then I come into the picture; an Armenian with Lebanese and Russian roots, born in America. My parents must've thought that they were still living in ancient Anatolia when they dubbed me "Mhair Karnik Zeitounian." (each name has an elaborate explanation that traces down my family tree) Albeit, I can boast about my uniquely rich name to David Jones standing next to me at the cash register, but David has to say his name once, and David will never be mispronounced, misspelled, or completely butchered.

That's when my identity takes temporary beatings. I've heard it all; Maher, Muhair, Mair, Myhair, and Morehair. My favorite interpretation came during my graduation ceremony at the University of Southern California, where just as I was about to be rewarded for my four years of hard work and dedication, I proceed to be publicly called "MOOhair."

Yes, the temptation is there. When the Starbucks barista asks for my name, I wanna say Mike, Tom, or Rob to save themselves and myself time to correctly spell a five letter name. But I don't. I stop and remind myself that I'm practically an alien compared to Billy behind me, and that awkward thought actually makes me happy. I'm proud with who I am, and how my people come from distant lands with history so rich it couldn't even compare to the United States.

Yep, I just wasted two minutes because I corrected the barista in spelling my name, and yep they still managed to get it wrong. But at the end of the day, my name is the only thing that's not going to change throughout my entire lifetime, and I'm not changing that for anyone.

Tuesday 10 May 2011

How Social Media Influences Self Worth

A few decades ago, your status was determined by the size of your house or by the type of car you drove. This status is now dominated by your online presence.

Social media, like Facebook and Twitter, are shaping people's streams of confidence and self-worth. With tools such as "commenting" people's pictures, or "liking" someone's wall post, users are increasingly seeking gratification from such reaction on their social media profiles.

It's as simple as this: Grace gets a brand-spankin' new hairdo, and posts a picture of her new hair. Instead of seeking opinions from a few family and friends like previously, Grace's new haircut is now being judged by her entire friend's list; a list that includes childhood friends, coworkers or teachers, and mere acquaintances. With every "notification" that she gets regarding this picture, she can either feel great about her haircut or think it's extremely lousy based off her so called "friends" reactions; so she stays glued to her Facebook page to help give her a reaffirmation of her haircut.

Besides just appearances, more serious matters are being judged, such as intellect and professional experience. Where you got your education, which company you are currently employed at, and even your interests in entertainment comprise your complete online presence. This presence becomes the cyber version of yourself, and stays in cyberspace to be constantly perused, accidentally encountered, and ultimately judged.

Social status has also evolved due to the digitization of one's network. People you connect with on Facebook are called "friends," and people who want to read your tweets on Twitter are known as "followers." The makers of these media are smart in choosing their words; using friends & followers to indicate a social media presence adds a level of competition among these sites that will drives the number of unique users skyward. It has evolved from the high school group of "cool kids" to the tech geek on Twitter who has followers from all seven continents.

With all of these devices utilized in social media, is it no wonder that younger generations are almost addicted to Facebook and Twitter. Once the major source of self gratification and self worth is achieved through the number of comments one gets on a picture or the multitude of "retweets" on Twitter, why would these users even worry about the size of their house? Social media has created a cheap thrill in reaffirmation by constantly nurturing a pseudo social identity, and as long as the world keeps going in a more digitized platform, serious identity issues become the inevitable.

Monday 17 January 2011

Breakfast with Dr. Jack Kevorkian


I had the privilege and opportunity to meet with Dr. Jack Kevorkian and his attorney, Mayer Morganroth, for an intimate breakfast meeting at the Peninsula Hotel in Beverly Hills. They were in Los Angeles for the Golden Globes, where "You Don't Know Jack" was nominated for awards. Here's how the one and a half hour long conversation went.

The first thing he asks when I meet him is what type of Armenian I am, to which I responded Lebanese. He looks to Mike, his lawyer, and says, "We come from all over the world," and smiles.

We sit down, and he tells me he's not going to eat much because he was having some cookies in his hotel room just before. He orders scrambled eggs, "perfectly cooked", white toast, and coffee. The waiter asks him if he wants any hashbrowns, and he says "Yeah, that would be good actually." The coffee arrives with a small cup of creamer. He touches the tin cup and says its too cold, for which he flails down our waiter and tells him to "not warm it up, but heat it up....I don't want it to cool down my coffee."

His friend said something, and Jack corrected him (it was a difference between "me and I"), and told me, "Americans don't know how to use the English language correctly nowadays," and take a low blow jab at Mike. It appears as though Mike constantly endures Jacks quips, and has gotten used to it over the years, as he brushed this one off too.

Our conversation consisted of several different topics. I ask him if he is excited for the Golden Globes, and he tells me he hates that sorta stuff. "I actually hate movies." He tells me he had no say in who was going to play him in the movie "You Don't Know Jack," where Al Pacino portrayed him. He says two of his friends wanted to make the film, and in order to not lose their friendship he agreed. The movie was based off a book written about his life, which he says was "terribly written and full of flaws." Because the movie was based off the book, there is no way he would reap any of the profits from the film, something he kept complaining about.

About being Armenian, he tells me that our country has the potential to be the most powerful, greatest little country in the world, if it weren't for our Christianity driven culture. As noted in the movie, he is anti-religious, and tells protestors that "My God's name is Johann Sebastian Bach, and at least he's not a made up one." He says the new religion for Armenians should be getting recognition of the Armenian Genocide.

The conversation then shifts to euthanasia. He repeatedly brings up the 9th Amendment, which in essence, states that only rules that are agreed upon by the general people should be followed, which contradicts all other amendments that limit your freedoms. He says that religion, ultimately, is like the jail sentence he served for 9 years, where you live a life the way someone else wants it. At this point, he mentions that he knows he is old and will pass soon, and uses this as his motivation to not live with fear. He says that people have too much fear, and this produces a lethal formula for progress, especially in regards to the Armenian people. Even though he lives in Michigan and has no accent whatsoever, he is extremely educated on Armenian politics and relations between America.

His lawyer kept getting phonecalls and would repeatedly leave the table, leaving Dr. Kevorkian and I alone. The first time he left, he started comparing the Jewish people with the Armenian people, and said he limits his talks about Jews with his lawyer Mike because he often gets insulted because he is Jewish.

One thing I noticed about Dr. Kevorkian is that he would always quote intellectuals and previous people in power, as if only those revolutionary types were worthy of looking up to. I noticed that about him; the way he spoke, and the things he would say, sounded revolutionary. He said that no reform has ever been accomplished without going to jail. Because of his 9 year sentence he served in jail where he was charged with "second degree murder" for asissting in the suicide of Thomas Youk, he is extremely bitter with the legal system of the United States. He repeatedly mentioned that the United States is a corrupt, money-driven entity, and as a result, the Supreme Court system is flawed. This reminds me of the back and forth banter Dr. Kevorkian had with Morganroth, about the differences in intentions between lawyers and physicians. "You can be a doctor because you genuinely want to help out another human being, it's not all about the money" says Dr. Kevorkian. "Yeah, but how many doctors are actually like that?" answers back Mike. "A lot more than lawyers, I can tell you that much," rebuked Kevorkian.

I ask Mike about attorney Mark Gerargos, and this is what he said: "Lawyers like him are all show. Usually, attorneys who are in the media and have a name are like actors. He has never won any major cases but has been lucky to be involved with a couple."

I realize that Jack is getting old. He started pouring salt into his coffee, and after a few seconds, looks at Mike, and says, "Mike, why am I putting salt in my coffee?" Mike responds with, "I donno Jack, you tell me."

I ask Jack about the Golden Globes, and he says he hates award shows like that. He doesn't like how everyone wears tuxedos and everyone looks the same. He jokes about the suit jacket he's wearing and tells me he found that at the Salvation Army. He says he enjoys shopping there, and that he doesn't care too much about clothes. He tells me how the producer of the movie once took him shopping at Saks Fifth Avenue, and says that he hated the experience. Mike responds with, "Yeah Jack, but you've always been frugal." This comment makes evident the close relationship between the two. They've known each other since the mid 90's, after Jack lost his famous trial.

I ask Jack about Michael Jackson, and his response was not pleasant. He tells me that Jackson is the symbol for American big money, superficiality, and everything corrupt within America. I think that it's a bit extreme, but don't push him any further. I ask about what he thinks about his doctor, Conrad Murray, and how he had his medical license suspended. He tells me, "What he did was nothing wrong. He was just a doctor giving his patient pain relievers. You must always respect what your patient asks for, and Murray can't be blamed."

Jack was coughing for a few seconds, and continued to spit some food into a napkin. He rolled up the napkin and placed it on the table. The waiter came, and Jack handed him the napkin saying "Be careful with this, I spit something in it."

As he continued to criticize the Armenian people and how religion sits at the forefront, I ask him if he is going to talk about that at the lecture that night at UCLA. He tells me he wants to, but he also does not want to lose his fans. I tell him that he should because the younger generations are more liberal, and would react more favorably than the older generations. He says he'll think about it. When I asked if he's looking forward to the lecture, he says, "I'm not going to lecture, kids don't like lectures, they get enough of them in their classes. I'm just going to go up there and say whatever is on my mind."

I asked him if he could sign my brothers album which was Jack's jazz album released in 1997. He tells me that most of the songs were spontaneous and he has a great time making it. He also humbles himself by saying he's not really good, but he just enjoys playing for fun. He also signed my copy of "You Don't Know Jack." I then take a picture with him.

Dr. Kevorkian was very good spirited, humorous, and seemed carefree at the core. His attitude is something that stood out for me, and something that I want to emulate in the future. I am grateful for Mike to set up this breakfast, and this will be a breakfast I will never forget.